Broken Telephone...

The President's hotline opened today at 9am. I called. There was no answer. I can't tell you how surprised I am. A government who wants to create open channels of communication with the public and what do you know? Those channels are closed.

There is some mental back peddling on my part. It goes a little something like this..."Oh, shame, it is only the first day. Maybe they're experiencing some technical difficulties." Yes, my sympathy vaccination is wearing off.

But hang on? This is the President's hotline we're talking about. Its not some lame, unfunded political party that believes in three day weekends, mandatory advanced driving lessons and free lemonade stands in previously disadvantaged areas. No, no. This is the President. Surely, he could pull a few strings to make sure it was all systems go by Monday morning at 9am.

That's one of the things we get wrong here in South Africa, politically in any case. We give away too many chances. Its like a life size game of Survivor China and we're behaving like the James and Denise's of the bunch. Giving away too many chances. That's why there is a hotline I would imagine. Because we're not keeping our promises, we keep letting it slide, to the point where there is a landslide of problems to tackle and no one knows where to start, so no one does anything. Do you want me to tell you how it ends?

We have a whole lot of frustrated people, taking whatever action they deem fit - that striking stuff...that's big now - and well, little else. I have to tell you, I didn't know too many people pleased about Jacob Zuma's appointment. I am impressed with his PR team though. He's taken the "sentimental" approach almost as far as President Obama. Visiting rural communities, talking to locals about service delivery and then of course, the hotline.

Now, I really hate to be the bearer of bad news but just what kind of caller are they hoping to attract to this hotline. I can tell you that in my opinion, call centers are the last person that you want to hear on the other end of the line. "Hi, this is Yellowreen, calling from Autopage/MTN/Vodacom/Cell C, we have a fantastic new offer, available for just one day only and we chose your name to sell it to." Lucky me.

The difference is that this is an inbound call center I would imagine. So that then begs the other question...firstly, who is going to lodge these complaints/ calls/queries and have these people been suitable trained to represent their party, the President and the people? There's a cul de sac right there. You can't be on all three sides, its impossible.

I am fortunate enough to allow myself the assumption that this hotline is the answer to President Obama's Facebook page. I think P Diddy Zuma should get himself online. Its the future. Besides, then no one will have to be paid to field calls from the Crap Talk types. You know...the ones with very narrow views on the country, who put their situation above the bigger picture, the people who just want to talk about race, complain about everything, the people who don't know a thing about politics but act like every regurgitate argument is an original thought.

The best part...everybody with an opinion is an expert and everyone believes that they are right. Like "How can the government spend so much money on cars and not on service delivery?" Or, "Why have a presidential jet/multi million Rand inauguration party/drunk judge on the bench/leader who stood trial for rape and had the charges of corruption dismissed?" I would put money on the fact that these are the questions that are going to be asked and what, I wonder are the scripted answers?

I might try and call again later and see if they have any answers to these seemingly rhetorical questions. But you know how it is, if its not working now...who knows when it will be working. That's South Africa, if its already broke, why fix it?

But, it was a nice sentiment. Wonder if the "Umshini wam" will be the on-hold music?